Containment Experiment

Containment

I’m not quite sure if that is a word or the right word but it is rather late (Meaning I’m too tired to google it) and it feels the most accurate for what I want to describe, my day. Or better yet how I’ve reacted or tried to react within my day.

Today was not a great day or a bad day. It wasn’t blah but it wasn’t stupendous. I don’t think it can be classified as a chill day with all that happened.

My reactions today varied as I’m trying to do my best to not overly react or emote (yet that comes naturally to me). I believe for the most part I started and ended the day with the “just ok” or containment mentality.

If honest, when people asked I’m not quite sure how I was hence the “ok” response to the how are you question asked throughout the day. This morning I asked the question to a colleague and she said she didn’t know. I related to her but my response was something to the effect of “sorry to hear that.” I think that sorry was just as much for me as I was frustrated at my own inconclusive feelings.

Throughout the day I definitely had moments of excitement. It could not all be contained and at times came out as squeals, claps, excitedly talking, or other sounds I make. My containment of excitement is me trying to take a pause before reacting or not letting the full extent of excitement come out. (I’ve been known to excite easily and at the smallest things which can be a bit much for people.) Unfortunately, when I’m frustrated or feeling not so great, I also tend to get quiet and pause before reacting. In essence me trying to contain the emotions in.

In trying to contain excitement or being “just ok” it may have appeared as I wasn’t doing so great. That’s definitely not what I wanted to portray. It’s been a while since I’ve done a proper science experiment so I haven’t fully formatted my hypothesis for this containment experiment just yet but it is definitely still a work in progress for me.

This post may have seemed a bit unusual/out of order with other things I’ve discussed but part of my dreamers journey is getting through each day to make it towards the dreams. Some days are a bit odd and seemingly out of place but it is all a part of the journey.

Until next time,

I’m CiggyG

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